My Sister and Me

            My sister and I have been trying to do more things together.  We are six years apart so growing up we never did much.  Eventually, I moved away and my idea of our relationship was of our mere memories together.  A major reason I moved back home was because I didn’t really know who my family was.  I didn’t want to go through life without a true understanding of my roots. 

After I came back I tried to become more a part of each family member’s life.  My sister’s has been the hardest to get more connected to, though.  We never really had a relationship in the first place so it’s like we were starting from scratch.  One area that we seem to connect in is music.  I’ll walk past her room and hear a lot of the same music I listen to.

            Seeing as my sister is a freshman in high school and is starting to spread her wings I thought I’d start taking her out to places with me.  For her birthday I bought her tickets to a Cage the Elephant show at the Rave.  She was pumped to go to her first concert.

            On the way down to Milwaukee we had time to just talk about whatever.  It was really nice.  We got to the Rave and I could tell she was a little nervous but I relaxed her and reassured her it would be fun.  Once we got in past security everything was fine.  The opener was a little weak but the second band, The Joy Formidable, were pretty good.  Then when Cage came on it was the exact show I wanted my sister to experience.

            Cage the Elephants was pouring of energy from the very beginning and carried that all the way to the encore.  Their lead singer moves about the stage violently the whole time and stage dove almost every other song.  At the end, he surfed along the crowd over the large balcony and got lifted up to the top, which was about 15 to 20 feet up.  After talking a bit, he climbed back over the railing and belly flopped back into the crowd.  It was insane.

            Overall, I’m happy my sister and I had that time to spend together and for her to see her first concert.   

The People We That Make Us

            Life’s a beautiful thing.  The way everything overlaps, simple and complex, joy and fear.  We have moments of clarity and then without warning find ourselves lost in one of the many fogs that lie waiting for us to come across on our journey.  At times, it seems as though nothing has meaning, holding no value.  Looking back on those valueless times and following their trails to our present day, brings some sense to the questions we have no answers for.  Our life is shaped by these experiences, but it’s the human element that carves the deepest mark on us.

            People come in and out of our lives daily.  The constant meeting and farewell we experience occur all while we have little awareness.  These brief greetings and long time relationships allow the flow of preference to enter our beings, creating expression and thought.  For example, you meet a man on the city bus wearing headphones that are radiating with exotic music.  Noticing that you are staring out of curiosity, he invites you to listen. 

Exiting the bus, you immediately head for the nearest music store in search of this refreshing sound.  It swirls through your mind; you’ve never felt these emotions before.  This man and his gift awaken thoughts that have never projected from you before.  Had you never gotten on the bus and met the music man you would never have expanded your musical taste or ability to think in the ways you do now.

On the other side of our human experience, long-term relationships twist together, playing off each other and moving in and out.  For many of us, the first impressions to our newly laid slates from the non-physical are of course our parents.  Depending on many situations, they dramatically influence our decisions and directions in this world.  Later on, friendships and life partners directly affect our preferences.  Our beliefs, our clothing, our diets; all affected by these relationships.  In one situation, a girlfriend may smoke cigarettes while you do not.  Her influence, although not at all an absolute result, may lead to your decision to bring tobacco into your life.  Up until her, you preferred to be smoke free but seeing as you enjoy the stimuli felt from thoughts and feelings from her habit you now smoke.  

People impacting people, creating preference and expression.

  

           

            

I just go to UW Sheboygan..

I’m glad I did this whole UW Sheboygan thing.  That’s what it was, anyway, until I really dove in.  As a senior in high school there were so many pre notions and pressures for going to a four-year university.  Honestly, going to Sheboygan sounded like a half ass experience and the epitome of practicality.  Coming from Elkhart Lake, just twenty minutes west of Sheboygan, with a smaller population I knew the social scene wouldn’t be so ideal. Like I thought, Sheboygan kids gather in groups, Kiel kids gather and so on.  Not everyone keeps to his or her high school classmates but the majority does.  Basically, there is no campus life and in reality with working and studying there isn’t much time for small bit that does exist.

            Eventually, after going about school totally hating my time here I decided to just really apply myself academically and to live with a welcoming mindset.  In doing this my time here has become so much more enjoyable.  My first few years out of high school I had absolutely no idea where I was headed with this life.  I blew a lot of money because of it.  Seeing as tuition is as cheap as it is here I managed to be okay.  Thank goodness.  I’d be far in the hole by now. 

            The people that go to school at UW Sheboygan all have wonderful stories and reasons for being there.  I feel as though we get pawned off as under par students or inferior to large university students.  I’ve talked amongst both groups of students and I love how Sheboygan kids are.  They have some intensity to them as students and as people that craves for life.

            The best thing about my “two year” college experience is how it’s made me really see what my community is.  I’ve heard countless conversations of dislike for Sheboygan and its surrounding cities.  They are ignorant and as a novice see’s only the surface, they lack in a sense of true knowing.  The people I’ve met, the stories I’ve heard, families and hardship, healers and drug addicts...  what lies unseen to the quick eye is a sorrowful loss.              

           

Holiday season

I love this time of year.  People start taking out their Christmas trees, putting up lights, and jamming out to holiday songs.  Every year I forget what it feels like to be in that holiday spirit.  With how busy life can get, from the stress to the worries that joy manages to slip away.

            For the past few years, I’ve worked on Holidays.  Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter… all these days were a means of making money.  Looking back on it, I have some good memories with the people I worked with.  When everyone’s at home opening presents or eating huge feasts, we come together as our own family.  It was an amazing experience I’ll always remember.  However, living how I have has wrecked all emotions for the holidays.  I don’t get as excited or look forward to them.

            This year, I decided to hang up my job.  Of several reasons, enjoying life and family is a priority that I have neglected for a long time.  I am now taking the initiative to bring life back into myself, my relationships, and of course... the holidays.  When I told my mom that I would be around this year the look on her face was one I hadn’t seen for too long. 

            I’ve already noticed small changes in myself.  I’m listening to holiday music, not because it’s on the playlist at work, but because I want to.  I’m planning on making cookies and our family’s tradition of Polish food.  In a little bit, I’ll be going down to Chicago to check out the lights on the Magnificent Mile.  It’s been very nice this year.

            

People watching

I love people watching, sitting back, out in public just observing the people that stroll by.  The types of people you see and how unique each one is reveals the beauty of humanity.  Everything from different styles of clothing to mannerisms becomes abnormally noticeable.  At the same time, we are also made to see how similar we are.

            I had a roommate a few years ago that loved people watching in airports.  She said that the diversity throughout the terminal was so interesting and amused her while she would wait for her flight.  Taking our conversation into consideration, I realized that I too naturally participated in this.  It was fun to see the different ethnicities traveling around the world and temporarily bunched together in this complex.  I love watching people late for their flight frantically half running to their flight.

            It’s really relaxing to do nothing while your just looking around, too.  Your mind settles into a calm state and your breathing slows.  Your view on life for that time leans towards a more receptive and open stance.  Rather than judge you just observe and think.

            If you ever get the time to or you’re in a situation where obligation to sit is in affect, people watch.  If anything it’s just fun to do.  I’m sure many of you already do if you haven’t noticed.  I’ve been doing it this whole time looking out a set of windows.  

Key to Success: Paradigm coffee house

I just want to take this entry to say thank you to Paradigm coffee house.  Basically, my collegiate success is because of them.  I hate studying at home; it just doesn’t work.  I mean, yes, I can do it, but most of my real progress comes from inside the doors of paradigm.

            The hours I’ve booked sipping Americanos and looking over ridiculous amounts of biology slides are large.  It’s almost instinctive to go straight from school to the coffee house.  I don’t think I’m alone when I say this either because I’ve seen many students busy with pencil pushing and some oh so flavorful Alterra coffee.

            I think another aspect to my liking of Paradigm as a study ground is that there is a lively energy there.  My desk at home is lit by a single lamp and sits in the corner of my room upstairs.  After so long I can only be secluded before it get’s super lonely; and I’m not a person to need to be by people.  At Paradigm, with people weaving throughout the maze of tables and couches, it’s like a booster for me to kick it in gear and pump out good work.

            What’s funny is that I’m writing this as an assignment for English and that I’m doing it while sitting at a table in Paradigm.  For real, like this place is my sanctuary.  I encourage you to participate in academic studies here; guarentee you’ll like what you find.  Side note: ear buds and some music help when it’s overly noisy.

           

     

Old movies anyday

A few nights ago I was in bed watching this old black and white movie trying to fall asleep.  I started thinking about how acting and the way people communicate in movies from then to now have changed so much.  Not only has the way people acted changed but also the styles and manners have transformed for a faster paced, short attention spanned audience.

Older movies from back when our grandparents were kids are truly cinematic masterpieces.  With all of the technology and effects we have today it’s pretty easy to overlook these films.  It’s a shame.  They are so pure and crafted to perfection by cinematic artists. 

The conversations within old films are simple but perfect.  Their grammar is usually to textbook, which really grabs my attention seeing as grammar isn’t a value amongst the youth these days.  Cursing and dulled out vocabulary are almost non-existent.  Actors on screen are so intimate and connected to each other.  Scene changes are less frequent and effects so limited that they were forced to rely on just good acting.

Comparing with movies today where many are composed of explosions, sex filler and terrible writing, old films will always come out on top.  Having said all this I do still believe good cinema is made today.  I just feel that the way movies were made back then hold some immeasurable romance and warmth to them.

Dance into the night

Ballroom dancing is so amazing.  I work at the Osthoff Resort serving food at banquets and large events.  We get all kinds of people, companies, and organizations coming through our doors.  This weekend, Ballroom dancing was at the center of our focus.  A good number of couples, being mostly in their later years in life, from all over Wisconsin and its surrounding states gathered for dinner and dancing.

            Friday night was the first of the two nights of dancing.  A little more casual, the couples were given the chance to meet everyone and relax in their new surrounding.  Their attire wasn’t completely upscale though very appropriate for the occasion.  Everyone seemed very friendly and all of our servers seemed to feel the same way.  Once dinner was finished, a few drinks polished off, the dancing began. 

Watching these folks moving across the floor was so nice to see.  They truly enjoy life and the company of their lovers.  The style of dancing would switch with each song.  Everything from the Waltz to the Cha Cha was seen across the floor. 

The second night of dancing was more of the finale.  The couples were wearing nice suits and dresses.  It looked like some elegant dancing in a movie from the twenties.  They had a multiple course dinner then, as the night before, began their passionate dancing.  I love to see the older couples that still hold hands as they walk to get coffee or give each other that look of love before kissing.  It was a wonderful evening. 

People Helping People

A very long time ago, I had a History teacher tell me of an organization that allowed people to lend money to entrepreneurs in developing countries.  I briefly thought about this idea; an admirable one I thought.  However, just as easily as I had heard of this organization I forgot it.  At the time I was in high school and so giving out money to people didn’t really appeal to me so much.

            Moving a few years forward to the beginning of 2011, I rediscovered this lending organization.  Searching one night for a way to give back to humanity or at least help I stumbled upon Kiva.  “Loans that change lives” read along with their name.  My old teacher flashed through my head instantly.

           

            Looking further into Kiva, I saw how the organization worked, allowing people like us here in the United States to give citizens of developing countries an opportunity to improve their lives.  The whole process is simple and effective.  A certain amount of credit is bought and stored on your personal account.  Then, you may look through a list of possible borrowers with their information of who they are and their reasons for needing a loan.  The pictures that come with each description really add life to the whole process.  The ability to pick your borrower allows for a personal and intimate connection. 

            The borrower eventually pays you back in a series of payments; a payback percentage model is available to view.  As your credit builds from getting back your money you have the option to relend to other borrowers or transfer it back to your bank.  This really is a wonderful gift to the people of the world.  In so many countries, it’s very difficult to obtain loans.  Kiva has put the ability to give these people, who desire to improve their life, the opportunity to do so. 

           

Be you

Some days really rock you.  I mean, when it comes to being true to who you are, there are always battles.  It should be easy being you but it most definitely is not.  One second you feel like you own the world then the next you come crashing down to the lowest of lows.  The list of challenges are never ending and your faith… not always a constant.  It’s almost like life’s main purpose is to torment you again and again until you break.

There’s no manual on how to go about living.  No one telling you what’s right or wrong and if there is it’s all relative opinions.  When you’re young, there is this false illusion that if you follow certain rules set by the all knowing you’ll be golden.  Then, with age, these all knowing and their creeds slowly start to dissipate from invincible walls to the smallest remains of what you thought would always be.  Watching this all happen right in front you kind of freaks you out.  Takes your feet out from below.

            Expectations and pressure plague your mind.  Friends with drug addictions, lost and parasitic.  Tears trail the length of your face, memories flash in and out thinking of them at their purest and how nothing but a silhouette remains. You believe in them, giving all of your being, but they are someplace else.  In there eyes, your friendship becomes a means to consuming in one-way or another.  Then you have to let go before they suck you dry of your light.  Besides them, you’ve got your own hell of a time resisting this lifestyle.  Seems like you look around and its all you see.  You just want to be clean.  Just want to be.

            Depression and debt cloud your family life.  Moms and dads hating each other.  Tug-o-war and you’re the rope.  You do everything to keep the peace but peace can only last for so long.  Parents ditching out for new lovers.  Little siblings looking to you for answers and you try to cover your cracks of imperfection.  Money flows but how do you manage it.. Save for some other day or treat yourself?  Looking at your love life, trying to find someone who’ll always have your back wondering do they even exist.  Then you do find someone but those oh so great problems are quick to arise.  Fighting, jealousies, sex, trust; I’m sure you can relate.  Even the clothes you decide to wear, your expression.  It’s one of the greatest ways to be you but those looks of disapproval can make you doubt yourself instantly.

            These descriptions are few compared to the many I could write about.  It is crucial, however, that you believe in yourself.  We need individuals that would prefer to create their world and create it with an acceptance and respect for others.  The most important thing is to stand for something.  So many people could care less about the future or anyone else but themselves.  These people would rather go get faded and kick it with their friends.  This paradigm is rapidly spreading to the masses.  Kids just want and they want it now.  It’s always how can you serve them; no one wants to be of service.  Most people don’t even know why they’re at school or what they’re working towards.  The aspiration to make this world a better more loving place is amongst the few.  We have to work to create a united people, united and standing for something good.  And with all that said.. “Remember to always be true, no matter what you do”   -the Guru, R.I.P

                                         

Street

We go up staircases everyday and rarely notice the handrails tracing the edges on each side.  If we do, the thought is brief. They are objects with one purpose, guidance.  Typically, we avoid the use of them knowing the amounts of germs that scale up and down their surfaces.  This is the majority view on handrails.  However, through the eyes of a snowboarder you’d see that these are handrails thriving with life, an opportunity for expression and creativity.

            Snowboarding is usually associated with snow and mountains.  The idea of pine trees, groomed runs, and chairlifts tends to be the general picture.  This is only a small branch in the snowboarding world.  Another direction to take your style of riding, often unheard of, would be to the streets. “Street riding” is a subculture within a subculture.  These riders go into cities, towns, or any place with concrete, buildings, and metal, looking to unveil the life within.  A typical spot for riding could be a railing behind Walmart or a ledge enveloping a loading dock at some company.  It is endless as to what you can ride in a street environment.

            A normal setup for these street sessions would entail having a snowboard, a means for getting snow and momentum, and a shovel.  When a spot is located, the first thing is to make the in-run up to the rail.  An in-run is a trail of snow wide enough for your snowboard to move across and ends with a small jump to place you up onto the rail.  If there is no snow in the vicinity that you are riding then you have to bring it from abroad via truck beds or tarp-lined trunks.  Also, the landing at the bottom of the rail should have adequate amounts of snow giving you time to stop your momentum.  After the setup is constructed then you are free to express your riding.

            Getting enough speed for the rail requires one or two people to pull or push you along the trail of snow.  Another way is to build an incline of some sort in which you ride your snowboard down a steep but short declining ramp which gives necessary speed.  From there it’s all about having fun.  There is some inspiring and addictive feeling that comes with being able to express your skills in an area that wasn’t intended for it.  Once you submerse yourself in this world, you will never look at urban architecture the same again.   

Mmm I smell coffee

Coffee is a wonderful blessing.  Every thing about it adds to our lives.  The taste is robust and soothing.  Rich aroma radiating from freshly ground coffee, even for non-coffee drinkers, lifts spirits and stimulates sensual pleasure.  Who doesn’t enjoy taking a deep inhale when they pass the coffee aisle at the store? The stimulants within this drink make every part of your mind and body present and aware.  Our desire for coffee employs millions all over the world, creating an enormous industry.  Socially, going out to get coffee is a major component, whether it’s for business or just kickin’ it with friends.

            Early in the morning the alarm clock goes off.  My eyes are slow to open having been fastened together by a night’s sleep.  I stumble my way around the kitchen piecing together some fast and flavorless excuse for breakfast.  A little more alert now, I shower up and find my attire for the day.  Finally, after all the tedious and repetitive parts of my morning are completed, I cozy up into the sofa with a freshly brewed cup of coffee.  Black and hot.  I am now at peace.  The first cup goes down so smooth and so right; the second, just as satisfying. 

            Moving beyond the micro viewpoint, the coffee industry is a widespread moneymaking opportunity.  From Africa to South America, low-income families depend on the coffee tree for their bread and butter.  Often, these families are indigenous and don’t even speak their country's official language.  This can be dangerous; for example, some indigenous people in South America speak ancient languages and not Spanish making it impossible to read the warning labels explaining the harmful effects of pesticides.  There are places in Ethiopia where rituals and coffee are combined.  A series of three small cups of strong coffee are drunk before beginning the day’s work.

            Everyday millions of people walk through coffee shop doors accompanied by friends and people of interest.  Business people sit down to go over a new product line all while sipping coffee.  Analyzing chart after chart must strain their mindset so the wonders of coffee complement these tasks very well.  Friends find conversation provoked and brought into raised levels of enthusiasm with a few good cups of java.  After a mind-numbing exam an Americano is the best way to restore mental functionality and dive back into the never-ending student life of studying.  

           

             

            

Pizza, Pizza

Cheap paper-thin pizzas are a significant component to the lives of younger generations.  This delicacy almost seems to be the center at which our social communities revolve.  I can remember countless times where pizza was the common ground for friends meeting up at someone’s house for a night of leisure.  Pizza acts as the communal watering hole; many different kinds of animals gather for the same necessity. 

What are cheap pizzas?  Well, they are not the glorious displays of freshly baked dough lightly coated in the richest of marinara sauces covered by a perfect balance of salted meats, vegetables, and golden cheese.  Nope.  These pizzas are the freezer burned, mass produced, five for ten bucks display found in excess throughout food stores nation-wide.  No special touch to these bad boys.

A typical Friday night might begin with friends out having a few drinks, discussing how their week went.  It gets late and the whole evening has consisted of flushing out their stomachs of all previous meals.  Everyone reaches the munchies phase and filling up on food as fast as possible becomes priority.  The habitual response to this would be to go into the freezer and grab a few pizzas.

Whether it’s a long day at school or you and your friends are just bored looking for some cure, there’s always a warm spot in that belly for these cheap treats.  So the next time your inhale one of these pizzas with a crew of slobbering friends, say thank you to the pizza god’s for this blessing being shared.  

2 Kids Only?

So my biology professor was lecturing the other day and randomly spit out a little known fact that really got me thinking.  He briefly explained that if only two children were allowed to each family in the world then the rapidly decreasing necessities for humanity would be restored.  I couldn’t believe that after all the obstacles we face with this problem and it’s seemingly dark fate that this is all we need to do.

This seems like it would be such an easy thing to do and as serious as not having food is you’d think we would strive for a solution.  However, there are cultures on this earth that support reproduction for no other than ego.  If a man can produce a lot of children then he’s a “real stud” according to their customs.  Good luck making these people choose abstinence.  Then, some farmers rely on having large families to work the farm.  Maybe they can’t afford to pay workers and have to use children.  Who knows, that could have a huge impact on farm communities.

Impoverished communities often have large families.  The lack of education and purpose may lead to reproducing more often and at younger ages.  People who don’t have knowledge of contraceptives would more than likely end up as parents.  In some cultures, contraceptives are not accepted because of religious beliefs.  That right there extremely impacts population numbers.  

Another question is how would we go about enforcing this law.  Many people want large families just because of desire.  Do we incarcerate them or penalize them?  Accidents happen and kids are made.  This law would also interfere with rights in many countries.  It almost has a dictatorship feel to it but if it was for the best then could we argue?