My Sister and Me

            My sister and I have been trying to do more things together.  We are six years apart so growing up we never did much.  Eventually, I moved away and my idea of our relationship was of our mere memories together.  A major reason I moved back home was because I didn’t really know who my family was.  I didn’t want to go through life without a true understanding of my roots. 

After I came back I tried to become more a part of each family member’s life.  My sister’s has been the hardest to get more connected to, though.  We never really had a relationship in the first place so it’s like we were starting from scratch.  One area that we seem to connect in is music.  I’ll walk past her room and hear a lot of the same music I listen to.

            Seeing as my sister is a freshman in high school and is starting to spread her wings I thought I’d start taking her out to places with me.  For her birthday I bought her tickets to a Cage the Elephant show at the Rave.  She was pumped to go to her first concert.

            On the way down to Milwaukee we had time to just talk about whatever.  It was really nice.  We got to the Rave and I could tell she was a little nervous but I relaxed her and reassured her it would be fun.  Once we got in past security everything was fine.  The opener was a little weak but the second band, The Joy Formidable, were pretty good.  Then when Cage came on it was the exact show I wanted my sister to experience.

            Cage the Elephants was pouring of energy from the very beginning and carried that all the way to the encore.  Their lead singer moves about the stage violently the whole time and stage dove almost every other song.  At the end, he surfed along the crowd over the large balcony and got lifted up to the top, which was about 15 to 20 feet up.  After talking a bit, he climbed back over the railing and belly flopped back into the crowd.  It was insane.

            Overall, I’m happy my sister and I had that time to spend together and for her to see her first concert.   

The People We That Make Us

            Life’s a beautiful thing.  The way everything overlaps, simple and complex, joy and fear.  We have moments of clarity and then without warning find ourselves lost in one of the many fogs that lie waiting for us to come across on our journey.  At times, it seems as though nothing has meaning, holding no value.  Looking back on those valueless times and following their trails to our present day, brings some sense to the questions we have no answers for.  Our life is shaped by these experiences, but it’s the human element that carves the deepest mark on us.

            People come in and out of our lives daily.  The constant meeting and farewell we experience occur all while we have little awareness.  These brief greetings and long time relationships allow the flow of preference to enter our beings, creating expression and thought.  For example, you meet a man on the city bus wearing headphones that are radiating with exotic music.  Noticing that you are staring out of curiosity, he invites you to listen. 

Exiting the bus, you immediately head for the nearest music store in search of this refreshing sound.  It swirls through your mind; you’ve never felt these emotions before.  This man and his gift awaken thoughts that have never projected from you before.  Had you never gotten on the bus and met the music man you would never have expanded your musical taste or ability to think in the ways you do now.

On the other side of our human experience, long-term relationships twist together, playing off each other and moving in and out.  For many of us, the first impressions to our newly laid slates from the non-physical are of course our parents.  Depending on many situations, they dramatically influence our decisions and directions in this world.  Later on, friendships and life partners directly affect our preferences.  Our beliefs, our clothing, our diets; all affected by these relationships.  In one situation, a girlfriend may smoke cigarettes while you do not.  Her influence, although not at all an absolute result, may lead to your decision to bring tobacco into your life.  Up until her, you preferred to be smoke free but seeing as you enjoy the stimuli felt from thoughts and feelings from her habit you now smoke.  

People impacting people, creating preference and expression.

  

           

            

I just go to UW Sheboygan..

I’m glad I did this whole UW Sheboygan thing.  That’s what it was, anyway, until I really dove in.  As a senior in high school there were so many pre notions and pressures for going to a four-year university.  Honestly, going to Sheboygan sounded like a half ass experience and the epitome of practicality.  Coming from Elkhart Lake, just twenty minutes west of Sheboygan, with a smaller population I knew the social scene wouldn’t be so ideal. Like I thought, Sheboygan kids gather in groups, Kiel kids gather and so on.  Not everyone keeps to his or her high school classmates but the majority does.  Basically, there is no campus life and in reality with working and studying there isn’t much time for small bit that does exist.

            Eventually, after going about school totally hating my time here I decided to just really apply myself academically and to live with a welcoming mindset.  In doing this my time here has become so much more enjoyable.  My first few years out of high school I had absolutely no idea where I was headed with this life.  I blew a lot of money because of it.  Seeing as tuition is as cheap as it is here I managed to be okay.  Thank goodness.  I’d be far in the hole by now. 

            The people that go to school at UW Sheboygan all have wonderful stories and reasons for being there.  I feel as though we get pawned off as under par students or inferior to large university students.  I’ve talked amongst both groups of students and I love how Sheboygan kids are.  They have some intensity to them as students and as people that craves for life.

            The best thing about my “two year” college experience is how it’s made me really see what my community is.  I’ve heard countless conversations of dislike for Sheboygan and its surrounding cities.  They are ignorant and as a novice see’s only the surface, they lack in a sense of true knowing.  The people I’ve met, the stories I’ve heard, families and hardship, healers and drug addicts...  what lies unseen to the quick eye is a sorrowful loss.              

           

Holiday season

I love this time of year.  People start taking out their Christmas trees, putting up lights, and jamming out to holiday songs.  Every year I forget what it feels like to be in that holiday spirit.  With how busy life can get, from the stress to the worries that joy manages to slip away.

            For the past few years, I’ve worked on Holidays.  Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter… all these days were a means of making money.  Looking back on it, I have some good memories with the people I worked with.  When everyone’s at home opening presents or eating huge feasts, we come together as our own family.  It was an amazing experience I’ll always remember.  However, living how I have has wrecked all emotions for the holidays.  I don’t get as excited or look forward to them.

            This year, I decided to hang up my job.  Of several reasons, enjoying life and family is a priority that I have neglected for a long time.  I am now taking the initiative to bring life back into myself, my relationships, and of course... the holidays.  When I told my mom that I would be around this year the look on her face was one I hadn’t seen for too long. 

            I’ve already noticed small changes in myself.  I’m listening to holiday music, not because it’s on the playlist at work, but because I want to.  I’m planning on making cookies and our family’s tradition of Polish food.  In a little bit, I’ll be going down to Chicago to check out the lights on the Magnificent Mile.  It’s been very nice this year.

            

People watching

I love people watching, sitting back, out in public just observing the people that stroll by.  The types of people you see and how unique each one is reveals the beauty of humanity.  Everything from different styles of clothing to mannerisms becomes abnormally noticeable.  At the same time, we are also made to see how similar we are.

            I had a roommate a few years ago that loved people watching in airports.  She said that the diversity throughout the terminal was so interesting and amused her while she would wait for her flight.  Taking our conversation into consideration, I realized that I too naturally participated in this.  It was fun to see the different ethnicities traveling around the world and temporarily bunched together in this complex.  I love watching people late for their flight frantically half running to their flight.

            It’s really relaxing to do nothing while your just looking around, too.  Your mind settles into a calm state and your breathing slows.  Your view on life for that time leans towards a more receptive and open stance.  Rather than judge you just observe and think.

            If you ever get the time to or you’re in a situation where obligation to sit is in affect, people watch.  If anything it’s just fun to do.  I’m sure many of you already do if you haven’t noticed.  I’ve been doing it this whole time looking out a set of windows.  

Key to Success: Paradigm coffee house

I just want to take this entry to say thank you to Paradigm coffee house.  Basically, my collegiate success is because of them.  I hate studying at home; it just doesn’t work.  I mean, yes, I can do it, but most of my real progress comes from inside the doors of paradigm.

            The hours I’ve booked sipping Americanos and looking over ridiculous amounts of biology slides are large.  It’s almost instinctive to go straight from school to the coffee house.  I don’t think I’m alone when I say this either because I’ve seen many students busy with pencil pushing and some oh so flavorful Alterra coffee.

            I think another aspect to my liking of Paradigm as a study ground is that there is a lively energy there.  My desk at home is lit by a single lamp and sits in the corner of my room upstairs.  After so long I can only be secluded before it get’s super lonely; and I’m not a person to need to be by people.  At Paradigm, with people weaving throughout the maze of tables and couches, it’s like a booster for me to kick it in gear and pump out good work.

            What’s funny is that I’m writing this as an assignment for English and that I’m doing it while sitting at a table in Paradigm.  For real, like this place is my sanctuary.  I encourage you to participate in academic studies here; guarentee you’ll like what you find.  Side note: ear buds and some music help when it’s overly noisy.

           

     

Old movies anyday

A few nights ago I was in bed watching this old black and white movie trying to fall asleep.  I started thinking about how acting and the way people communicate in movies from then to now have changed so much.  Not only has the way people acted changed but also the styles and manners have transformed for a faster paced, short attention spanned audience.

Older movies from back when our grandparents were kids are truly cinematic masterpieces.  With all of the technology and effects we have today it’s pretty easy to overlook these films.  It’s a shame.  They are so pure and crafted to perfection by cinematic artists. 

The conversations within old films are simple but perfect.  Their grammar is usually to textbook, which really grabs my attention seeing as grammar isn’t a value amongst the youth these days.  Cursing and dulled out vocabulary are almost non-existent.  Actors on screen are so intimate and connected to each other.  Scene changes are less frequent and effects so limited that they were forced to rely on just good acting.

Comparing with movies today where many are composed of explosions, sex filler and terrible writing, old films will always come out on top.  Having said all this I do still believe good cinema is made today.  I just feel that the way movies were made back then hold some immeasurable romance and warmth to them.